EDITORIAL comments on TRP v0.98

[christopher ferris <chris.ferris@east.sun.com>]

All,

Here are my EDITORIAL comments on v0.98. Again, I wish to express my
sincere thanks to the hard work and dedication of the editing
team. They did an outstanding job!

I have organized my comments by type (Editorial, Minor and Major
Technical) in separate emails for convenience. I have also listed 
the section and line number for ease of identifying the change location 
in the context of subsequent revisions.

I have also numbered each comment for ease of reference in any discussion.

Note that I only made it through section 8 with the level of detailed
scrutiny needed to catch editorial comments. I'll try to find some
time this weekend to review the rest of the spec for these and any other
minor technical edits.

Cheers,

Chris

EDITORIAL

general

1 - the term 'ebXML Message Service' is inconsistently treated
	with font decoration. It should be italicized in all cases as it
	is a glossary term.

2 - the terms 'ebXML Message Service' and 'ebXML Messaging Service'
	both appear in the document. The former should be the term used
	and it should be italicized in all cases.

3 - the term SOAP Message is inconsistently treated with font decoration.
	Suggest that it always be italicized

4 - we should consistently treat all "Notes" with some font decoration
	convention and we should list this convention in section 4.2
	with a disclaimer that all Notes are to be treated as
	informative (non-normative).

section 4.4

5 - line 77 - add SOAP and SOAP Messages with Attachments to list of
	things with which the reader is assumed to have familiarity

section 4.5

6 - line 91/92 - remove reference to non-existant Service Interface specification

section 5

7 - line 97 - remove '(MS)' we only use shorthand acronym for MSH

8 - line 104 - every item??? I would recommend the following substitute text:

	Every effort has been made to ensure that the REQUIRED functionality
	described in this specification has been prototyped by the ...
 
section 6

9 - line 107 - remove '(MS)' we only use shorthand acronym for MSH

10 - line 11+ - suggest inclusion of the following text to introduce use of SOAP

	The ebXML Message Service is defined as a set of layered extensions
	to the base Simple Object Access Protocol [SOAP] and SOAP Messages
	with Attachments [SOAPATTACH] specifications that have a broad industry
	acceptance, and that serve as the foundation of the work of the W3C
	XML Protocol Core working group. The ebXML Message Service provides
	the security and reliability features necessary to support
	international electronic business that are not provided in
	the SOAP and SOAP Messages with Attachments specifications.

section 6.2

11 - line 122 - suggest we change 'Messaging Service Layer' to 'Message Service Handler (MSH)'
	as this is the term used elsewhere throughout the document. 

12 - line 132 - the acronym MSH is not defined, comment above would resolve this issue

13 - line 145 - the acronym MSH is not defined, comment above would resolve this issue

14 - line 148 - can we enlarge the figure so that it uses the whole
	page? It would aide readability.

section 7

15 - line 152 - suggest the following substitute text:

	An ebXML Message is a communication protocol independent MIME/Multipart
	message envelope, structured in compliance with the SOAP Messages with
	Attachments [SOAPATTACH] specification, referred to as a Message Package.

	There are two logical MIME parts within the Message Package:
	...

section 7.2

16 - line 180 - extraneous space precedes 'All'

17 - line 181 - Content-Type font decoration inconsistent
18 - line 186 - Content-ID font decoration inconsistent
19 - line 188 - start parameter font decoration inconsistent

section 7.3.2

20 - line 218 - insert the word 'fragment'
	The following fragment represents ...

21 - line 233-235 - Either strike as no longer relevant or update the
	examples in the Binding section as they do not include
	XML prolog or charset parameter. This text used to refer to
	the appendix that JUST had a sample ebXML Message

section 7.4.1

22 - line 251 - insert the word 'fragment'
	The following fragment represents ...

section 8

23 - line 274/5 - capitalize Header and Body and decorate with bold/italics
	as these are XML elements.

section 8.2

24 - line 311 - decorate Envelope with bold/italics

25 - line 313 - add forward reference to section 8.2.1
	... Header namespace as defined in section 8.2.1.
			    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

section 8.4.1

26 - line 389 - remove 'Header'

27 - line 392 - decorate 'version' with bold/italics 

28 - line 393 - add backward reference to section 8.2.1
	... as defined above in section 8.2.1.
			    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

section 8.5.4.1

29 - line 465 - remove 'then'

section 8.5.7

30 - line 522 - missing section cross reference to section 10

section 8.5.7.1

31 - line 524 - suggest relocating this section so that it
	directly precedes section 8.6 (SequenceNumber)
	for better readability since SequenceNumber
	refers back to messageOrderSemantics attribute.

32 - line 524 - strike 'parameter/'

33 - line 524 - change 'MUST be' to 'is'

34 - line 524 - strike 'by the From Party MSH'

section 8.5.7.2 

35 - line 547 - change 'MUST be' to 'is'

36 - line 565 - strike 'on the message just received,'

37 - line 572 - fix the heading! example spilled over into following section
	heading.

section 8.5.8

38 - line 574 - change:
	The SequenceNumber is an element that ...
	to:
	The SequenceNumber element ...

39 - general - change 'Sequence Number' to 'the value of SequenceNumber' and
	decorate with bold/italics

section 8.6.3

40 - line 659 - change 'Parties' to 'instances of an MSH'

Appendix A 

41 - line 2014 - suggest we change heading to: ebXML SOAP Extension Elements Schema